Legacy Archives

Suburban Senshi Entry #2237 - “[SPAM MiST] Haruka's desperation! Searching Emails for the secret to Better Loving!!”
#2237 “[SPAM MiST] Haruka's desperation! Searching Emails for the secret to Better Loving!!”
Excerpt Start - 07:33 AM 11/08/21

#suburbansenshisquad
.'~SugaBB_2999~'.
i regrat playang da t suad game
FireFly_9
... That wasn't a Squid game, it was a sex toy.
.'~SugaBB_2999~'.
a defactav 1
SpeedRcr_X
Man
SpeedRcr_X
Man ever since Michiru almost left me for the overly-muclebound Madoka fusions I've lost all confidence in my macho sensibilities
SpeedRcr_X
But modern technology has failed to help me find a solution to this problem
FireFly_9
Technology?
SpeedRcr_X
Yeah back in the day you'd get tons of emails everyday on methods to improve your performace, but now there's none
FireFly_9
Haruka-poppa that was spam E-mail which is filtered out now by default.
SpeedRcr_X
OH so that's what that folder's for! Awesome that they decided to put it all in a dedicated place so you can easily find it!
FireFly_9
...
SpeedRcr_X
Let's see here...
SpeedRcr_X


Hello,

A novel stance of Boxing Administrator for our parcel biz has just been started. Our association offers a very large check and instructional bundle to do you as a teammate of our partnership's expanding and heavily effectual crew.


.'~SugaBB_2999~'.
wayit da chack an instractanal bandle doez u?
FireFly_9
Don't get any ideas, Chibiusa-chan.
SpeedRcr_X
Maybe this is special erotic training
FireFly_9
I don't... where are you getting this?
SpeedRcr_X
You'll understand when you're older
FireFly_9
I WAS BORN IN 1981
SpeedRcr_X
Well when you get less sheltered
SpeedRcr_X


We learned thy information by virtue of the CareerBuilder web site and count up that your knowledge might be valuable for us. Supposing thou are touched by our fellowship's work, would you please compose an e-mail to our management so our comradeship's manpower wardens would be able to specify to you superior location's description.


FireFly_9
"thy"... and "thou"... and "fellowship"? did this just become a Tolkien spam?
GERMATOID
NGL "MANPOWER WARDEN" SOUNDS LIKE A GREAT JOB TITLE! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!
.'~SugaBB_2999~'.
i went sum menpowar
SpeedRcr_X
I want this superior location's description so I can begin my erotic retraining and rebuild my confidence to seduce my wife.
FireFly_9
Haruka-poppa, you're starting to sound like the spam mail.
SpeedRcr_X


Remuneration: ,000 a month.

The given offer is only for operators that show their interest to act from within their doors. If ya'll may afford to corporally be present at thy house starting from nine AM ending with 5 PM, you would pull up dollars.


Reverend_H
YO PULL UP DOLLAS YO
RedCrow
God even working from home it's a pain in the ass being corporeally present from 9-5
C'est_La_V
Is this why you never answer me on slack??
RedCrow
I never answer you because you ask stupid things
RedCrow
Like how the hell do I know if your cat s[BLEEP]t on your bow
SpeedRcr_X


. You all will be a sterling participant at the job if you are a fresh mamma, a pupil of online option of schooling, pensioner, unable to work normally outdoors man or woman, or the human being which doesn’t like to make departure building for function.


SpeedRcr_X
I am the human being which doesn’t like to make departure building for function. For sure.
setsy_meioh
You literally only go outside to turn on the perfection field and make people swoon over you.
SpeedRcr_X
Don't be jelly because you never had that capacity
SpeedRcr_X


Ya'll shall not be constrained to work with ponderous clots. Principally, you shall see gowns or puppets inside. Educative material is produced for no cost.


Texas Samurai
"Y'all shall not be contrained...?"
setsy_meioh
Well you're disqualified, Haruka. Since they don't want "ponderous clots".
SpeedRcr_X
...Gowns and puppets frighten me so I might want to disqualify myself
FireFly_9
Wait, you fear puppets?
SpeedRcr_X
The Muppet show is a f[BLEEP]king eldritch abomination. and don't get me started on Sesame Street whre Big Bird worshipped an invisible Elephant for YEARS
FireFly_9
I'm pretty sure Snuffleupagus was a Woolly Mammoth
SpeedRcr_X
SEE THAT'S EVEN WORSE HE SHOULD HAVE BEEN EXTINCT
SpeedRcr_X


All you all shall need to possess work from our camaraderie is a on-table computer, entrance to the online net, and printer to be able to print bills of lading. How much ye will get relies only on ye – the more ya'll work, the more money you all receive. On average, laborers which simply launch functioning for our fellowship obtain about 1000 cash per 7 days.


Texas Samurai
How'd this email go from Th' Hobbit t' 'Dolly Parton advertises'?
// J_Daito //
I have an on-table computer but my entrance to the online net is slow at 14.4kbps
GERMATOID
I HATE PEOPLE LIKE YOU WHO COMPLAIN ABOUT SITES LIKE MINE BECAUSE YOUR TEXT BROWSER DOESN'T RUN JAVASCRIPT
// J_Daito //
Look I am the ustomer and you are meant to accomodate me. I should never have to adapt to your new-fangled needs.
GERMATOID
OK BOOMER
// J_Daito //
Look just because I'm 10,000 years old
SpeedRcr_X


Are you induced by our job? Don't hesitate to send a letter to our management through e-mail. Add your Full name and your house location. But keep in mind about being at your dwelling from nine o'clock to 17.00 is your obligation to be able to take the appointment (or, the job isn’t for thou, unluckily)


FireFly_9
PICK A F[BLEEP]KING GENRE! HOBBITS OR HICKS!
Texas Samurai
...hicks?
FireFly_9
Erm
SpeedRcr_X


f


FireFly_9
Wait the last line literally is "f"
Texas Samurai
Hicks
// J_Daito //
Yeah "f" for "ya done f[BLEEP]ked up now" Tomoe the Younger.
SpeedRcr_X
I still don't see how joining their fellowship helps me seduce Michiru though
FireFly_9
Maybe she likes hobbit Cosplay
SpeedRcr_X
Well my feet are already all set
RedCrow
what
Excerpt End - 07:57 AM 11/08/21 - Thanks to Jewelry Jelly for passing this prime piece of Spam our way!

https://www.suburbansenshi.com





November 7, 2001: Ami was frantically studying for high school entrance exams, when Professor Tomoe attacked using Kiral and Akiral, determined to revive Metallia. As the Senshi stood there confused, The Amazon Trio joined them, trying to kill 'taru for no good reason. Tuxedo Mask got to look cool by entering the scene riding a motorcycle. When all hope seemed lost, the Senshi got a break through a precision-guided rose throw from Tuxedo Mask. Sailor Moon used the Moon Spiral Heart Attack finisher to win.
Hit!Graph
<FireFly_9> After that the colostemy bag exploded.




Suburban Senshi: Burning Ourself Perfectly since 2002
Destroy this website!!